Fallout 5 Character: Marla “Merry” Baines
“Welcome to the beach, sugar! Wipe your boots. And if you shoot my husband, I’ll feed you to the filter.”
Marla Baines is one of those Fallout characters who looks harmless, sounds harmless, and can become astonishingly hostile in less than ten seconds.
She is a 5'5", slightly chubby, middle-aged woman with bright red braids/plaits hanging around her shoulders. Her cheerful light-brown eyes make her look as though she is perpetually happy to see somebody. When she walks, her whole body rocks gently from side to side in a distinctive penguin-like wobble.
Nobody around the settlement mocks the walk.
Not anymore.
Marla “Merry” Baines
Age: 52
Height: 5'5"
Build: Slightly chubby, soft-looking but stronger than expected
Hair: Brilliant red braided plaits, usually decorated with seashells, colored glass and bottle caps
Eyes: Light brown, unusually cheerful and expressive
Occupation: Beachkeeper, cook, scavenger, unofficial tourist guide, occasional psychopath
Home: Baines Beach, an entirely artificial beach built by Marla and her husband
Husband: Curtis “Curt” Baines
Alignment: Fundamentally good, temperamentally unpredictable
Locals have several nicknames for her:
Merry Marla.
Beach Mom.
Red Braids.
The Sand Hen.
The last one should never be said where she can hear it.
Baines Beach
What makes Marla memorable isn't just Marla.
It's where she lives.
Marla and Curt found an abandoned industrial water-treatment reservoir surrounded by cracked concrete, rusted machinery and dead trees. According to Marla:
“It was the ugliest patch of dirt I had ever seen. So naturally I decided it needed a beach.”
Over nearly twenty years, the couple transformed it.
Not into something resembling a wasteland settlement.
Into an absurd approximation of a pre-war vacation beach.
They hauled sand from riverbanks.
They pulverized pale concrete and mixed it with real sand.
They constructed filtration pumps from water purifiers, swimming-pool equipment and industrial pumps.
They planted mutated reeds around the edges.
They built wooden boardwalks.
They collected lawn chairs.
They repaired umbrellas.
They painted old traffic barriers bright colors.
They turned half of a wrecked bus into a beach bar.
A huge hand-painted sign reads:
BAINES BEACH
NO RAIDERS
NO MINES
NO SHOOTING
NO PEEING IN THE WATER
SERIOUSLY
There are little changing booths even though almost nobody understands why a wasteland settlement needs changing booths.
Marla insists.
“Civilization ended because people stopped having standards.”
Her Husband: Curt Baines
Curt is almost the complete opposite of his wife.
Quiet.
Patient.
Slow-speaking.
Difficult to anger.
He is usually repairing filtration machinery while Marla talks enough for both of them.
Visitors sometimes mistakenly assume Curt is henpecked.
He isn't.
Their marriage is surprisingly affectionate.
Marla can spend ten straight minutes complaining about something Curt did before casually walking over, kissing his forehead and bringing him lemonade.
Curt frequently translates Marla for newcomers.
Marla:
“GET THAT FILTHY DAMN BRAHMIN AWAY FROM MY CLEAN SAND!”
Curt:
“She doesn't want livestock past the fence.”
Marla:
“THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I SAID.”
They have survived raiders, contaminated water, super mutants, famine and several attempts to steal their purifier.
Their relationship is one of the rare genuinely stable marriages in the wasteland.
The Penguin Walk
Marla's walking animation should be unique.
Her arms hang slightly outward.
Her shoulders gently rock.
Her hips sway in the opposite direction.
Her steps are short but surprisingly quick.
When she gets excited, the wobble becomes faster.
When she is furious, it becomes hilarious and terrifying because she begins waddling toward the offender at maximum speed.
Imagine hearing:
“YOU BETTER START RUNNING!”
and watching this cheerful little woman rapidly wobble toward a raider with a meat cleaver.
The animation should remain even when she becomes a temporary companion.
NPCs can occasionally recognize her from a distance purely because of the walk.
“Is that Marla?”
“Can't see her face.”
“Look at the walk.”
“…Yeah. That's Marla.”
Two Marlas
The most important part of her personality is that neither side is fake.
She really is incredibly nice.
And she really can be incredibly mean.
Cheerful Marla
She loves meeting people.
Unfortunately, meeting Marla can become a commitment.
Ask her how the beach was built and you may receive an eleven-minute story involving Curt, a broken water pump, three mirelurks, somebody named Stanley and a completely unrelated recipe for roasted mutfruit.
She interrupts herself.
She remembers another story halfway through the first story.
Then another.
Dialogue options occasionally appear like:
[Listen] “What happened next?”
[Attempt Escape] “That's fascinating, Marla…”
[Interrupt] “MARLA.”
[Endurance 7] “Keep going.”
Choosing [Endurance 7] repeatedly can eventually earn:
PERK: GOOD LISTENER
Marla likes you.
That's it.
At first.
Later, however, Good Listener unlocks information because talkative NPCs trust the player more easily.
Mean Marla
Certain things instantly flip her personality.
Threatening Curt.
Hurting children.
Abusing weaker settlers.
Stealing from her beach.
Contaminating her water.
Damaging her decorations.
Kicking one of her beach chairs over after she specifically asked you not to.
The cheerful voice disappears.
Her face hardens.
Her dialogue becomes short.
“Pick it up.”
The player can respond:
“What?”
“The chair.”
If they refuse:
“Curt! Get my hammer.”
Curt, somewhere in the distance:
“Which one?”
Marla:
“THE ONE FOR PEOPLE.”
She Doesn't Bluff
One of Marla's funniest characteristics should become apparent during the player's first visit.
A raider wanders onto Baines Beach demanding supplies.
Marla initially responds politely.
“Honey, we're not interested.”
The raider threatens Curt.
Marla pauses.
Smile disappears.
She grabs a homemade double-barreled shotgun hidden underneath a beach towel.
BOOM.
Then she looks at the player.
“Anyway, you thirsty?”
The conversation immediately resumes.
Marla's Weapon: “Beach Etiquette”
Her signature weapon is a heavily modified short double-barreled shotgun.
Painted turquoise.
Little white flowers are painted around the receiver.
A tiny wooden sign wired to the stock reads:
MIND YOUR MANNERS
Marla calls it Beach Etiquette.
It has unusually vicious close-range stopping power.
Its unique legendary property could reward extremely close shots:
BEACH ETIQUETTE
+35% damage within 6 meters.
Successful point-blank hits have increased stagger.
Marla explains:
“If I wanted to shoot somebody far away, I'd leave them alone.”
But Her Real Weapon Is Conversation
Marla should possess extraordinarily high Charisma.
She knows caravans.
Settlement leaders.
Farmers.
Scavengers.
Mercenaries.
Travelers.
Former raiders.
She remembers everyone's children.
She remembers who married whom.
She remembers what somebody said eight years ago.
This makes her unexpectedly important to the regional information network.
Want to know who passed through recently?
Ask Marla.
You may just have to survive the story surrounding the answer.
Dynamic Conversation System
Marla could use an unusual NPC system:
Talk Momentum
The longer Marla speaks without being interrupted, the more comfortable she becomes with the player.
Dialogue branches expand.
Eventually she begins revealing information she wouldn't consciously consider important.
For example:
“Oh! Speaking of tomatoes, there was this funny man here yesterday. Huge fellow. Scar across his neck. Carried one of those military rifles…”
The player realizes she's casually describing the fugitive they've been tracking.
Her rambling therefore becomes a gameplay mechanic rather than merely a joke.
Players who consistently cut her off may miss clues.
Quest: “A Little Piece of Somewhere Else”
Eventually Marla tells the player why they built the beach.
She doesn't actually remember visiting a beach before the war.
Neither does Curt.
Their idea of one came from a damaged pre-war tourism magazine Curt found decades ago.
Blue water.
White sand.
Children running.
Colorful umbrellas.
People doing absolutely nothing.
Marla became obsessed with the concept.
Not the ocean.
The normality.
“Imagine having enough peace that sitting around doing nothing was considered an activity.”
That line gives her character considerably more depth.
Baines Beach isn't just eccentric decoration.
It's their monument to the idea that humanity can eventually live instead of merely survive.
Main Quest Problem
The reservoir begins losing water.
Initially everyone suspects damaged pumps.
Curt investigates.
The pumps are fine.
Someone upstream has diverted the water.
The player discovers a growing settlement has constructed an improvised dam because they also need the water to survive.
There is no obvious villain.
Baines Beach needs the supply for drinking water, agriculture and filtration.
The upstream settlement needs it for crops.
Marla's immediate reaction:
“They stole our water.”
Curt quietly answers:
“They're thirsty, Mar.”
She looks at him.
Long silence.
“…I know.”
That changes the quest.
Possible Solutions
The player can negotiate a regulated water-sharing agreement.
Repair an abandoned secondary pumping station.
Construct a pipeline connecting another reservoir.
Force the upstream settlement to dismantle its dam.
Destroy the dam secretly.
Convince Baines Beach to abandon part of its artificial lake.
Or manipulate both settlements into attacking each other.
Marla's relationship with the player changes dramatically depending upon the solution.
If the player finds a peaceful engineering solution, Marla becomes one of their strongest allies.
If the player murders the upstream settlers unnecessarily, she may actually despise them.
Despite her temper:
Marla isn't cruel.
That's important.
Her aggression comes from protectiveness, not bloodlust.
The Beach Party
Completing the best outcome unlocks something unusual for Fallout.
A genuine wasteland beach party.
Settlers travel from surrounding communities.
Radios play old music.
Food vendors arrive.
Children play in shallow purified water.
Robots carry trays.
People wear ridiculous salvaged swimwear.
Someone inevitably gets drunk.
Curt lights lanterns around the reservoir.
And Marla walks around talking to absolutely everyone.
The player can sit beside her near the end of the event.
She quietly watches people enjoying themselves.
For perhaps the first time in the entire game, Marla doesn't talk.
The player can ask:
“Nothing to say?”
She smiles.
“Nope.”
Pause.
“Just wanted to look at it.”
Then She Ruins the Moment
Thirty seconds later:
“Actually, did I ever tell you about the time Curt tried fixing the purifier without pants on?”
Curt:
“Marla.”
Marla:
“THEY SHOULD KNOW.”
Recruitable Companion
After completing her questline, Marla can occasionally leave Curt in charge of Baines Beach and travel with the player.
Curt doesn't seem concerned.
He tells you:
“She'll come back.”
Then:
“You might not.”
Companion Role
Marla isn't built as a conventional sniper or heavy weapons companion.
She's a close-range support/social companion.
She excels at:
Shotguns
Improvised melee weapons
Intimidation
Bartering
Civilian interactions
Settlement encounters
Detecting lies through conversation
Extracting information
De-escalating arguments
Escalating arguments spectacularly when diplomacy fails
Companion Ability: “Did You Hear About…”
When Marla accompanies the player, visiting populated settlements gradually reveals additional rumors, locations and quest leads.
Because she talks to everybody.
Occasionally the player leaves a shop and discovers Marla has somehow learned about:
a missing caravan
abandoned military supplies
somebody's secret affair
a raider hideout
a legendary creature
a hidden bunker
somebody selling rare ammunition
an upcoming faction operation
The player didn't ask.
Marla simply found out.
Companion Perk: Everybody Knows Marla
At maximum affinity:
EVERYBODY KNOWS MARLA
Settlements and caravans become more willing to trade information with the player.
Certain Charisma checks become easier.
Traveling merchants occasionally provide small discounts.
Additional rumor-based encounters appear.
And sometimes when entering a completely new settlement:
“MARLA?!”
She responds:
“HEY, BABY!”
Player:
“How do you know these people?”
Marla:
“I get around.”
Her Temper Should Be Systemic
Instead of her anger only occurring during scripted scenes, Marla could possess a Temper Threshold.
She accumulates irritation based upon what happens around her.
Someone insults her.
+5.
Someone insults the player.
+3.
Someone insults Curt.
+50.
Someone attacks civilians.
+100.
Player repeatedly interrupts her stories.
+2.
Player steals from someone.
+10.
Player shoots somebody innocent.
Potential immediate hostility.
Her verbal behavior changes progressively.
Stage 1
Cheerful.
Stage 2
Passive-aggressive.
“Well, aren't you precious.”
Stage 3
Irritated.
“You're working my last nerve.”
Stage 4
Mean.
“Keep talking.”
Stage 5
Beach Etiquette.
Extremely Rare Interaction
If a Super Mutant insults her size:
Super Mutant: “LITTLE ROUND HUMAN.”
Marla stares upward.
Marla: “Curt.”
Curt: “Don't.”
Marla: “He called me round.”
Curt: “He's a mutant.”
Marla: “And now he's a rude mutant.”
She attacks.
Why Marla Works
Marla wouldn't merely be “the funny waddling lady.”
She represents something Fallout doesn't explore enough:
people deliberately recreating happiness.
Most wasteland communities build walls.
Marla and Curt built a beach.
Most people collect weapons.
They collected umbrellas.
Most survivors preserve ammunition.
Marla preserved the concept of taking a day off.
And underneath the bright braids, constant talking, penguin wobble and ridiculous flower-painted shotgun is someone with a surprisingly powerful philosophy:
“Surviving ain't the same thing as living, baby. If all we're gonna do is survive, what exactly are we saving humanity for?”
That could make Merry Marla and Baines Beach one of those seemingly comedic Fallout encounters that gradually becomes one of the most human places in the entire game.
.jfif)
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